I got back to Bangkok in the evening.  I don’t like my hotel.  It smells like mildew.  I was lucky enough to be able to cancel my future booking at this hotel, but not tonight.  I only picked it because it was close to the airport.  The next morning I flew to Samui.  I’m looking forward to spending some time relaxing on the beach and some time with my friends from Singapore.  My hotel in Samui is kind of disappointing too, but it’s clean enough and right on the beach so no need looking for a new place.  Still, three hotels in a row, come on…..

I saw a dive shop near my hotel when the taxi brought me from the airport.  We are near Tao and I’d heard they had the best diving in Thailand so maybe there can be good diving in Thailand.  Samui and Tao are islands kind of near each other (1 hour by boat).  Plus, the idea of being completely covered in water sounds like heaven right now.  I went by the dive shop.  They are going to Tao tomorrow – great!  It was expensive.  Why is this sport so expensive?

The diving was just as bad as in Krabi.  It’s official, diving in Thailand is not good.  I know a four dive sample selection is hardly scientific research, but it’s enough for me.  Everything was covered in a light brown blanket of ook.  I have no idea what the ook is, but it looks slimy and yucky.  There were hardly any fish.  The people I dove with were nice so that’s some consolation.  And I was covered in water for a couple hours and that was wonderful.  Two of the ladies that we dropped off after diving were staying at a fancy hotel.  The guards wouldn’t even let us in until they had run a camera under the van to check for scary things.  I bet the resort was $800 a night.  It was definitely cost more per night than I made last month.  The stark difference between that resort and mine was comical.

We went on an all island tour the next day.  The tour itself was meh.  But, we decided it would be Judy’s birthday and we would post pictures on facebook of her birthday day and see if any of her friends figured out that it wasn’t.  It made for a day of laughing so hard your stomach hurt.  It also provided for many fun photos especially after we got the pointy Vietnamese birthday hats.  The tour took us to many Buddhas, of course.  The tour highlight was grandmother and grandfather rock.  Grandfather rock was plain to see, but we never figured out grandmother rock.  Later, a post card showed us what we didn’t find.  I’m including a picture of the post card because I had to see it so I think you should have it burned in your memory too.  Really?  Genitalia shaped rocks are a tourist attraction?  “Come to Samui and see the big Buddha and genitalia rocks!”  After lunch we saw a mummified monk.  We decided he wasn’t real.  Then when we read that he wasn’t actually mummified, but that his body just didn’t decompose after he died, so they put some sunglasses on him and stuck him in a glass box.  Well that must be real then.  There was a waterfall that was so far from a waterfall that I’m not even posting a picture of it.  What Thailand tour would be complete without sad elephants being misused for tourism?  I will not post pictures of them either.  That evening we went out for “Judy’s Birthday” dinner and live music after.

The bay we were staying on was shallow.  You could walk for hours and never see water deeper than your waist.  So, I bought a raft and floated around for part of the day.  That day was a close to relaxing and doing nothing as I know how to do.  That evening we found a lovely restaurant with bean bag chairs on the beach and happy hour drinks.  Two bars over was an acoustic guitar player with the most wonderful voice.  After about two hours we got up and went to watch him.  The last day was more floating until it was time to go to the airport.  Two sweet ladies from the hotel took me to the airport in their pickup truck.  The Samui airport is ridiculous.  When you get there it’s like a posh outdoor mall.  I don’t even remember going through security, but I’m sure it happened.  When you get to the gate, its an open air pavilion with uncomfortable but trendy seating.  There are cats everywhere, it’s sweltering hot, but they have free snacks.  I sat in front of one of the portable air conditioners with my free popcorn and pineapple juice and tried to pretend I didn’t feel horrible.  Then you get on small trams that look like you are a Florida theme park and they trams take you to the plane.  Of course on the plane, it’s so cold I have to put on long pants and a hoodie with the hood up.  I’ll take the cold over the hot though.  I’m looking forward to the next 10 days.  I’ve signed up for a fitness camp so I will just be eating healthy food and working out for 10 days.

So my plan to relax and spend some time on-line researching potential jobs didn’t work out.  But I did enjoy spending time with Judy, Andy and Ivan and laughing so hard my sides hurt.

(c) All rights reserved Kimberly Fiore