Flashback

On November 28, 2016December 5, 2016 By rrainefioreIn Teaching, UncategorizedLeave a comment

Here is a blog I wrote quite a while ago. Thailand has very strict Les Majistae laws. You can’t say anything negative about the King or royal family. They don’t have the same laws about other things, Thai, but I still thought it best not to post this while I was living in Thailand.

I’m a bit frustrated with the Thai school system. When half my class failed their exams, I’m told I should let them re-test. I tell the students they can re-test and I’ll average the two scores. I tell them exactly which subjects to study and show them pages in the workbook they can do for practice. Almost all of them got the same exact score the second time. These are supposed to be the advanced English classes. They show up late, they don’t turn in their homework and they are constantly doing some school activity or another instead of having classes. No matter how bad they do on homework, classwork or tests, I cannot fail them. I should give them extra work to make up their marks. This extra work should help them learn, but shouldn’t be too hard or time consuming. This extra work shouldn’t have a deadline and neither should the homework. Basically, the concept of consequences for your actions doesn’t exist. If they misbehave, there isn’t much I can do. I can’t assign extra work. I can’t keep them late even though they showed up 20 minutes late to my class because some other teacher kept them late. The Thai teachers can hit them for discipline. How is any of this preparing them for the world outside school? I guess, if their world is just Thailand maybe it’s ok. But, the country wants to prepare its students for being part of the world outside of Thailand. The world outside of Thailand will eat them alive and spit them out. When I asked about teaching curriculum I was told “up to you”. I have no idea what they already know or don’t know. I have no idea what topics I should be teaching. “Oh just teach speaking and listening”. Thanks. That’s useless. Then two weeks before the midterm exams, I’m told I have to create exams. I create exams, but then I’m told they need to match the objectives in my curriculum, the curriculum I was never told I needed to write. So, I make up objectives. I’m told 3 will be enough. Then after the exams I have to do grading, but everyone tells me a different way I need to report the grading. And now I have 10 objectives I need to use, not 3. They have to be these specific objectives, not the 3 I came up with. Why on earth wasn’t I given these before the semester or before the midterms? None of the objectives match anything I have taught and are all just a random jumble of words on a page that sound like a good plan. Is this the way the whole education system works? Then this week, I find out that final exams are after my last day of work. Who do they assume will grade my exams and fill out my grading sheets? No one notifies me of anything ahead of time, but I’m supposed to jump when asked or somehow miraculously have something ready when asked. Then I’m told I’m taking things too seriously – so teaching students is not important or it is? Apparently reading minds is a skill they think I should have. I spend most of my free time alone working and most people wonder why I would ever want to leave. I see other western teachers posting on facebook about how wonderful Thailand is, how much they love it here, and how much they love teaching. Are they lying or am I the only one having this Thailand experience? Don’t get me wrong, there are wonderful things about Thailand and I’ve met wonderful people. I came for the experience, not to stay forever and I’ve gotten an experience. And I’m pretty sure I’ve been more engulfed in the culture than any of them have.

Travel Day

On October 23, 2016October 24, 2016 By rrainefioreIn Thailand, Travel, Uncategorized1 Comment

Yesterday was my last day at Phuket Fit. I gained weight – fat, not muscle and I was dehydrated on my check out stats. I think they had my food goals off a little, but my biggest goal was to try to get my body to want to exercise again. After over a year with no exercise, I was tired and unmotivated. So, I feel ready to go again. I was hoping to process a lot of my experiences over the past eight months, but that didn’t seem to happen or is happening in a different way or is partially happening. So more on that later as I figure it all out. I didn’t take as many pictures as I wanted of Phuket Fit, but a few are attached.

Today I had a lovely pancake breakfast with Lynne and James. I might have gained some more weight just from breakfast. I went to the airport early, because what was I going to do for two hours after hotel check out in the rain?

Besides, my airline reservations were sketchy and I figured if something was amiss, I’d have time to fix it. I had a minor freakout when I booked the flight and the confirmation came from a company different from the airline. My confirmation came through with the note that I could not check in on line because the airline wouldn’t have my info on line. I could only check in at the airport in person. It also had the copy of someone else’s credit card attached to the confirmation. What? Then I reminded myself that everything works out exactly like it should. And if something seems unlikely in Thailand, it will work out exactly as billed no matter how unlikely it sounds. There is some sort of “that can’t work” magic in Thailand that makes unlikely things work. In any other country, I’d be buying another ticket today. I sat in a restaurant for a couple hours until the check in desk opened. I got in line to check in. There were about 30 middle aged or older Thai women in line. Is this the Thai middle aged woman airline? One lady made me go ahead of her and her friends because there were 7 of them and they didn’t want me to have to wait for them. So nice. Then the husbands started arriving – oh, the women go and wait to check in while the men do what? I checked in fine (duh – of course – magic) and now I’m waiting for my flight to board.

I might do some more blogs tonight when I get to Bangkok. I fly to China tomorrow. China blocks a lot of websites. I bought a VPN, but I’m new to this concept so we’ll see how it goes. But, if I don’t post for two weeks, I’m either having way too much fun or the VPN didn’t work. I hope China has “that can’t work” magic like Thailand does.

Coral Cut

On October 20, 2016October 20, 2016 By rrainefioreIn Thailand, UncategorizedLeave a comment

I haven’t written in awhile mostly because I don’t know what to say. A lot is going on spiritually, but I don’t know how to put any of it into words. So, that will have to come later after it’s done processing through my system.

On a more superficial level, I’ve just been working out and eating. There are a bunch of workout classes available every day, but I’ve been attending around three high intensity fitness classes a day. I’ve been having trouble getting out of bed in the morning so I’ve been sleeping more too.

It’s been an interesting meeting the people here. The staff is all nice and wonderful. Some of the guests are kind of snobby which I didn’t expect. Some of the guests are very nice though. Most of the unfriendly guests have left so it’s more pleasant now. Most of the guests are return guests and I can see why. This place is well run and provides something people need.

One night there was a trip to a night market. Since I love Thai markets, I went. I didn’t love this market. It was really for tourists. But, I’m on one of the biggest tourist islands so it makes sense. There was another night market trip the next night to a different market. I decided to skip it.

Loi Krathong is the lantern festival that I’m coming back for in November. It’s been canceled in Chiang Mai because of mourning for the king. The festivities were canceled in Tak, but they are still going to do the actual floating of the candles in the river which is what I wanted to see. So, I had to change all my hotel plans and pretty soon I need to figure out where I’m going to go after that. I would have skipped it altogether, but I still have a suitcase of stuff at Noi’s house that I need to get and a plane ticket to Mae Sot which is not refundable.

When I was diving in Samui I touched some coral with my knee and it turned all red. When I asked the divemaster what he thought it was he said “coral” as if it was no big deal. It didn’t look like a cut. It wasn’t until 4 or 5 days later that I noticed tiny scabs where the coral had cut me. Then about a week later it puffed up and turned even redder. Someone here suggested I go to the doctor right away because it was infected. I looked it up on line and it said to seek medical attention right away. Great. So I rode my motorbike in the pouring rain to the nearest clinic. The doctor gave me a cream. I asked if I needed an antibiotic and she said pointed to the cream. How is a cream going to get under the skin to the infection? I went home later and did a little homegirl surgery. I cut some of the skin away so that the cream could get in. I also used some tea tree oil and neosporin just in case those might be helpful. I’m pretty sure neosporin is the answer to most medical problems. Then I broke my no searching things on the internet after 10pm rule and looked at the coral cuts info closer. This rule was set in place for a reason and breaking it means no good sleep. I read that there are all kinds of nasty things in salt water and coral cuts often get infected and then if you see a dark line on your arm or leg you need to go to the emergency room for iv antibiotics. I woke up every few hours to check my arms and legs for dark lines. I have antibiotics my doctor gave me before I left Colorado in case of an emergency. I started taking those. It’s been a few days now and no dark lines, just an upset stomach from the antibiotics.

Yesterday I rode the motorbike around and went to two overlooks and a beach. We have been having a lot of stormy weather due to big storms in the Philippines. The wind was so strong it was blowing salt mist way up past the beach. The waves were huge. It was unfriendly for swimming which was good, because I didn’t feel bad that I can’t swim because of my coral cut. It was nice and relaxing to watch the waves crash and watch the sea move. I feel like just watching it reset something and I was more relaxed after. It was also nice to ride around and see some of Phuket. It’s more mountainous than I expected. I like it.

Today I took another field trip. When I was looking for fun things to do near here, I found a rum distillery that gave tours. I have drank a lot of rum over the years, but didn’t know how it is made. It was a small distillery and the tour was interesting. The rum was real good too.

I have two more days of fitness camp and then travel back to Bangkok and then off to China!

20161016_080915 — Abandonded (except dog) building next to hotel

20161016_164609 — Nearby beach isn’t much of a beach

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20161020_074211 — Another view from my hotel

PhuketFit

On October 14, 2016October 14, 2016 By rrainefioreIn Thailand, Travel, UncategorizedLeave a comment

I arrived in Phuket in the evening. Whoa, it was a long drive from the airport to my hotel, the Blue Rabbit. It looked like my hotel is the only thing around. Across the street is an actual abandoned building, not one that looks abandoned. There were two very nice ladies waiting for me. One carried my very heavy suitcase up to the third floor. I felt bad. They both were very talkative and helpful. The room is the nicest hotel room I’ve seen in a while. Yay!

Yesterday I started at Phuketfit with an orientation of the facilities and a fitness evaluation. About half the people there are trying to lose weight. They have a weight loss program, a detox program and a fitness program. I joined two of the workout classes and did yoga after dinner. So far the food has been good, but the portions are quite small since most people are counting calories to lose weight where I’m trying to pack in more calories and more protein to help rebuild muscle. Overall, I’m very impressed with the place and glad to be doing this although it hurts physically and financially.

Today I just couldn’t drag myself out of bed. They have exercise classes all day so I don’t need to do the first one in the morning anyway. I did three exercise classes today and I’m so stiff and my shoulders and left knee don’t want to work right. I cried during the last class. I expect there will be more crying as the 10 days go on. Or not.

The King of Thailand died yesterday. The country will go into mourning for a very long time. I want to write more about it, but I should not so you can watch the new or look for news on line if you want to know more.

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Samui

On October 12, 2016October 14, 2016 By rrainefioreIn Thailand, Travel, Uncategorized1 Comment

I got back to Bangkok in the evening. I don’t like my hotel. It smells like mildew. I was lucky enough to be able to cancel my future booking at this hotel, but not tonight. I only picked it because it was close to the airport. The next morning I flew to Samui. I’m looking forward to spending some time relaxing on the beach and some time with my friends from Singapore. My hotel in Samui is kind of disappointing too, but it’s clean enough and right on the beach so no need looking for a new place. Still, three hotels in a row, come on…..

I saw a dive shop near my hotel when the taxi brought me from the airport. We are near Tao and I’d heard they had the best diving in Thailand so maybe there can be good diving in Thailand. Samui and Tao are islands kind of near each other (1 hour by boat). Plus, the idea of being completely covered in water sounds like heaven right now. I went by the dive shop. They are going to Tao tomorrow – great! It was expensive. Why is this sport so expensive?

The diving was just as bad as in Krabi. It’s official, diving in Thailand is not good. I know a four dive sample selection is hardly scientific research, but it’s enough for me. Everything was covered in a light brown blanket of ook. I have no idea what the ook is, but it looks slimy and yucky. There were hardly any fish. The people I dove with were nice so that’s some consolation. And I was covered in water for a couple hours and that was wonderful. Two of the ladies that we dropped off after diving were staying at a fancy hotel. The guards wouldn’t even let us in until they had run a camera under the van to check for scary things. I bet the resort was $800 a night. It was definitely cost more per night than I made last month. The stark difference between that resort and mine was comical.

We went on an all island tour the next day. The tour itself was meh. But, we decided it would be Judy’s birthday and we would post pictures on facebook of her birthday day and see if any of her friends figured out that it wasn’t. It made for a day of laughing so hard your stomach hurt. It also provided for many fun photos especially after we got the pointy Vietnamese birthday hats. The tour took us to many Buddhas, of course. The tour highlight was grandmother and grandfather rock. Grandfather rock was plain to see, but we never figured out grandmother rock. Later, a post card showed us what we didn’t find. I’m including a picture of the post card because I had to see it so I think you should have it burned in your memory too. Really? Genitalia shaped rocks are a tourist attraction? “Come to Samui and see the big Buddha and genitalia rocks!” After lunch we saw a mummified monk. We decided he wasn’t real. Then when we read that he wasn’t actually mummified, but that his body just didn’t decompose after he died, so they put some sunglasses on him and stuck him in a glass box. Well that must be real then. There was a waterfall that was so far from a waterfall that I’m not even posting a picture of it. What Thailand tour would be complete without sad elephants being misused for tourism? I will not post pictures of them either. That evening we went out for “Judy’s Birthday” dinner and live music after.

The bay we were staying on was shallow. You could walk for hours and never see water deeper than your waist. So, I bought a raft and floated around for part of the day. That day was a close to relaxing and doing nothing as I know how to do. That evening we found a lovely restaurant with bean bag chairs on the beach and happy hour drinks. Two bars over was an acoustic guitar player with the most wonderful voice. After about two hours we got up and went to watch him. The last day was more floating until it was time to go to the airport. Two sweet ladies from the hotel took me to the airport in their pickup truck. The Samui airport is ridiculous. When you get there it’s like a posh outdoor mall. I don’t even remember going through security, but I’m sure it happened. When you get to the gate, its an open air pavilion with uncomfortable but trendy seating. There are cats everywhere, it’s sweltering hot, but they have free snacks. I sat in front of one of the portable air conditioners with my free popcorn and pineapple juice and tried to pretend I didn’t feel horrible. Then you get on small trams that look like you are a Florida theme park and they trams take you to the plane. Of course on the plane, it’s so cold I have to put on long pants and a hoodie with the hood up. I’ll take the cold over the hot though. I’m looking forward to the next 10 days. I’ve signed up for a fitness camp so I will just be eating healthy food and working out for 10 days.

So my plan to relax and spend some time on-line researching potential jobs didn’t work out. But I did enjoy spending time with Judy, Andy and Ivan and laughing so hard my sides hurt.

20161009_200231 — Looks like a giant carrot farm

14516567_10153790085345689_4921030076694701170_n — Enter a caption

14568205_10153790120845689_752576006289661681_n — Where is Grandmother Rock?

14591876_10153790085260689_5281474207165994147_n — Enter a caption

14606477_10153790120895689_1399087476089378024_n — Enter a caption

14639654_10153790003580689_1062502109574031511_n — Enter a caption

14650555_10153790655380689_809403383802942505_n — Oh, I lied, this is the waterfall

20161010_105657 — Look! A Buddha and Stairs

20161010_105716 — A dragon with flowers on its tongue

20161010_123101 — Beware Bag Necklace Snatching

14680628_10153790655840689_1373870517257308958_n — Postcard

14517536_10157496325980176_341731716972536799_n — Judy’s “Birthday” dinner

20161012_094057 — Scrambled eggs with cheese

To Kuala Lumpur

On October 2, 2016October 8, 2016 By rrainefioreIn Thailand, Travel, UncategorizedLeave a comment

I stayed in this cool hotel in Chiang Mai. I booked it because it was right next to the airport, had a coffee shop and was made of shipping containers. I have a friend that owns a company that makes houses out of shipping containers so I was excited to see a hotel with this concept. It was a great concept. But in effort to make the place look cool, they kept the restaurant open to the hotel section. If I opened the door from my room, I was looking directly at tables in the restaurant. Even with the door closed, it sounded like I was sitting in the restaurant. It was a very popular restraint and every table was full all night long. So, going to sleep early so I could get up early and well rested for my flight was not happening. Then they didn’t have a shuttle and were not willing to call a taxi for me so I had to walk 3 blocks to the nearest road to get a taxi. The coffee shop wasn’t open in the morning. The hot water didn’t work. Great idea, poor execution. They should have just had a kick ass restaurant and skipped the hotel part.

The Chiang Mai airport is so easy. No lines. My bag was overweight and they didn’t say anything. Security did take my deodorant though. Getting there wasn’t easy. I was literally next to the airport (could see the runway) and had to walk 3 blocks in the other direction to get a taxi. Then the taxi went 15 minutes in the wrong direction to drop someone else off. I swear it took 25 minutes to get back to the airport.

Flying into Kuala Lumpur, the ocean was an unnatural green, not the pretty pale tropical green it should be. It looked like radioactive waste. In places it wasn’t green, it was brown like a Colorado river in flood. I had originally planned to scuba dive, but then scrapped that plan when I realized all the scuba places were a 4-8 hour drive away from Kuala Lumpur. Now I know why they are so far away. Still between the weird water and the acres and acres of palm farms, it was a beautiful strange new world to land in. The highway is big and clean and at first glance everything seems to be much cleaner than Thailand. I bought a SIM card in the airport so my phone will work here. It seemed to be working, but on further inspection (in the cab, not in the store) it’s not. Yay technology. We drove past the city on the way to Genting Highlands. It’s a huge city. Genting Highlands is a tacky looking ridiculous casino at the top of a mountain. I found it when I was looking for jobs in Asia. I thought it would be a hoot to check it out and if I like it, maybe I’ll try my hand at dealing cards again. The road to Genting Highlands is very steep, steeper than most places in Colorado. The entire top of the mountain is covered in casino, hotel complex, and mist. Just driving through it is a maze of tunnels, high rise buildings and construction. If I had been driving, I’d still be driving in circles lost.

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20161002_153251 — Genting Highlands on top of yonder mountain

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Homeless

On October 1, 2016October 6, 2016 By rrainefioreIn UncategorizedLeave a comment

Last night there was apocalyptic thunder. It shook the whole house. The electricity went out twice. I remember storms like this in Florida, but have never seen (heard) storms like this in Colorado. I was so dizzy and feverish that I just hoped that the storm didn’t take down the house because I would be unable to move to safety.

I got up this morning and finished packing and cleaning. Then I sat and waited for an hour for Noi. She took me to the post office to mail a couple boxes and then to the highway to catch a bus. I’m now homeless. It should feel like a huge relief, fear, excitement, sadness or something, but it just feels empty. All my belongings fit into 4 bags or were mailed back to Colorado. I’m setting off on a travel adventure and I’m not excited about it. I feel lonely, but not sad lonely, just alone. And there seems to be no point in anything. Why travel? Why go home? Oh, I have no home to go to, just a storage shed full of stuff and a car I can’t afford. Should I sell everything I own and wander? Should I build a new home in Colorado or somewhere else? Where? I was restless and uncomfortable when I did have a home and I’m restless and uncomfortable without one. So, home or no home is not the answer. I wanted to get lost – I’m lost. So, I guess I’ll just wander and be lost or empty or full or alone or not and see what I see and see what happens next.

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Unemployed

On September 30, 2016October 5, 2016 By rrainefioreIn Teaching, Thailand, Uncategorized1 Comment

This morning was goodbye time. At morning assembly, they said goodbye to me in front of the whole school. The director gave a speech and Pat translated. He talked about how he could see my strong intention and kindness that I brought to the students every day. Kru Pat gave a speech and I gave a speech. Some of the teachers gave me gifts including Kru Pit who told me good luck and be happy in Thai and then hugged me. Two of my students gave speeches too. Of course, I was crying. So many people told me not to cry. It makes them so uncomfortable when someone shows emotion. Noi even asked me if I felt relief after releasing all my bad feelings. What bad feelings? Crying isn’t bad. It’s an emotion, it’s a natural part of being human. Everything exists at once, it’s not bad and then good. But, how do you explain that who believes in black and white so strongly?

Then everyone went into the meeting hall where they had ceremonies to say goodbye to the teacher who is retiring. There was a picture slide show, speeches, gifts, photos, singing, students prostrating, and more photos. One of the gifts at each going away I’ve seen is a fan. I wonder if a fan is the most popular gift. I’m glad I didn’t get a fan. I wouldn’t be able to take it with me. I love the singing and think it is a wonderful way to show gratitude, but I’m not too fond of the prostration. Why does this bother as a sign of respect, but singing doesn’t? (I had video of the singing, but wifi doesn’t want me to upload them right now). After all this each class came up on stage and took a photo with the teacher. When M1 was up there I remember thinking they looked so young (11 and 12 year olds). It struck me that here was a man saying goodbye to his old life, an old life as a teacher ending standing next to so much youth, lives that had barely begun.

After all the pictures most students and teachers had left. I noticed the M6/1 class standing in a circle patiently waiting for all the pictures to be done. They brought the retiring teacher into the center of the circle and sang to him. It was beautiful to watch. Before they had started they had asked me to wait and not leave the meeting hall yet. After they were done with him, they brought me into the center of the circle. Someone said they had to sing in English and they didn’t know what to sing so they sang the alphabet song. It was hysterical. Then they tried to sing “See you again”, but didn’t get past the first chorus. They finished with a Thai song. It was very touching and my favorite memory of the day. I didn’t get any photos or video of it. If they surface later, I’ll post them.

I wanted to buy one of the school shirts. There was one dark green one left and I was holding it up to see if it would fit. Kru Chelon came in and saw me. She had me try it on and then was so excited because she wanted to get me something, but didn’t know what so she bought the shirt for me. So sweet!

Random thought of the day: Why don’t they make belts in different sizes? Every girl has a belt that is way too big for her. So the tail of the belt wraps all the way around to her back or over to the other side. Since this is annoying, they hold the belt in place with a binder clip.

I didn’t do much the rest of the day which was good because I’m still sick and just feel horrible. Noi was supposed to come get the bags I’m leaving with her after school. She decided not to take them and we went to dinner instead. I felt so horrible that I barely made it through dinner, but I had no food at home so I didn’t really have much choice. At some point she said she thought Americans were frank and went on about how this was a bad thing. This is one part of Thai culture I just don’t agree with. I’d rather someone be honest with me than lie to me just because lying is “nicer”. This conversation, along with one about me being a liar because I say “I don’t know”, did me in. I’m too sick to deal with this right now.

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20160930_120127 — Trying on my new shirt

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line_p20160930_164244714 — Thompien, the Director and Pat

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School Farm

On September 28, 2016 By rrainefioreIn UncategorizedLeave a comment

I stopped by the school farm today. The lime trees are budding and most of the dragon fruit has been planted. I’m not sure any vegetables have been planted, but it makes for a great ghostly kind of picture. The banana trees are looking sad, but I think they will bounce back if someone waters them. My kitten buddy is waiting for me almost every day. He’s so cute and then he tries to destroy my screens. Too bad he didn’t show up when I first moved here. I might have took him in. Oh, and 2 days to go.

$%#&^(&( Trail

On September 28, 2016 By rrainefioreIn Teaching, Thailand, Uncategorized2 Comments

This weekend I didn’t have much to do. I packed. I cleaned. I rode my motorbike up to the top of the dam again. There’s a shrine up there I haven’t seen before so I walked up the steps to see it. There’s a shrine near the bottom of the dam too that I had never been to. I rode my motorbike up this ridiculous hill. I didn’t make it the whole way and had to push the bike the rest of the way. I barely made it. Then behind the shrine, I saw trails. What? They looked like mountain bike trails from the race not too long ago. This whole freaking time I could have gone hiking? My friend Gerry had asked why I didn’t go out into nature to process since I don’t have privacy at home. I told him there were no hiking trails and most everything is thick dense jungle that has monsters hiding in it. Then this trail appears. Damn it, too late.

Sunday I napped. I never nap. Monday I woke up feeling like death. My head is stuffed up and I can’t stop coughing. Oh, that’s why I napped. Noi took me to the hospital. The doctor said I have a cold or the flu. They gave me medicine and sent me on my way. I’m not convinced I don’t have a sinus infection. I slept most of the rest of the day Monday and half of Tuesday. I started feeling better today, but now I feel horrible again. I’m not surprised. I’ve been trying to hold it together and get a lot done in a short period of time. I’m stressed. I’m going back to bed.

20160924_142317 — This is what most of where I live looks like – No hiking here

20160924_133556 — What? A trail? Too late.

20160924_133422 — I’m not good enough to ride all the way up this

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20160924_141126 — A Buddha, elephants, zebras and chickens

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20160924_140057 — Karaoke house boats going out for the night

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	eaglegenuinec87d1476… on Going Home
	delicately4f6d967f14 on Going Home
	delicately4f6d967f14 on Icebergs
	delicately4f6d967f14 on ATV Tour
	eaglegenuinec87d1476… on Kluane

Rraine Drops

Tag: Thailand