Mother’s Day

I’m done with grading for now.  It was a very convoluted process, and I will have to do it again in a month, but it’s done for now.  There was no sports day this week like Pat had told me there would be.  But, did she tell me when it changed?  No.  I had to just wait and find out.  Good thing I planned lessons for this week. For some of my classes, I am doing a lesson on song lyrics.  I did Let It Go from the cartoon Frozen.  And I did Firework by Katy Perry.  I was quite struck by how beautiful our language is, not so much that it sounds beautiful, but that we have so many different ways to say something.  There are about 5,000 words in the Thai language and over one million words in the English language.  No wonder our language is so difficult to learn, but beautiful.  The basic message from the song Firework is that if you feel alone, unloved, unimportant, fat or ugly, that you are not.  You are wonderful and unique.  I know that getting the meaning of a song would be difficult for the students since it’s all analogies and idioms, but when I wrote on the board “Do you feel alone, unloved, unimportant, ugly…….”, they answered “no”.  I wonder if they don’t feel these things because their society is more communal and accepting than ours or if they just answered “no” because they don’t show negative feelings.  It was an interesting experience though.

There were two more parties this week, both for another teacher that is leaving.  I managed to get away before YMCA for one of the parties, but not the other.  The second party was nice because it was at the teacher’s house in a different village.  Her house was right on the river and there was a nice breeze out all evening.  But, I just don’t like karaoke that much and it’s constant.  My brain hurts just writing about it.  At some point some drunk guy from the neighborhood wandered up and tried to join in the festivities.  I could tell by the looks on people’s faces when he tried to talk to them that he was not invited.  It was wonderful to watch Q take control and mitigate the situation.  He found a chair for the man and got him a soda to drink.  Q sat him in front of the karaoke stage and sat next to him with is arm around him so the man might feel welcome, but was also kind of restrained from bothering the singers.

Thursday was Parents Day so everyone wore light or turquoise blue in honor of Mother’s Day because, you know, that’s what you wear.  I was told to wear blue, but not told the shade of blue so I kinda fit in.  The parents came to school in the morning.  There was traditional Thai dance, speeches and a lot of moving the Westerners from one place to the next. And of course, posing for 10,000 photos.  They take so many photos at every event.  I never see these photos.  I’m not sure where they go.  I was expected to give a speech, but no one told me before.  I think I know less Thai now than I did when I got here so giving a speech in Thai was impossible. Then after I spoke they asked Robin to translate for me.  I think he got the short end of the stick.  At some point we had to go plant trees.  This involved standing next to a new tree that someone else planted with a watering can in hand.

Tomorrow is Mother’s Day so we have the day off school.  It’s a big holiday here to celebrate the Queen’s birthday because she is the mother of Thailand.  I think celebrating your own mother is a second thought after that.

Most of my furniture was moved out of my house and into storage this week.  One room of bedroom furniture wasn’t moved because the room was locked.  I was livid when I got up in the morning and found this out.  A few emails and phone calls later, the issue is resolved.  My friend Jay will meet the homeowner at the storage place and move the rest in later.  Still, it shouldn’t be Jay’s responsibility to do this.  I am so thankful for all his help.

Xploreasia won’t work directly with my school because they don’t want to cause problems with the agent that assigned me to this school in the first place.  That’s understandable, but then they offered to call the agent and my school when I informed them that my school would not be able to afford to work with that agent anymore.  The agent is punishing my school by charging them more than they can afford next semester.  Why would you call the agent?  This is exactly how we got into this drama in the first place.  That agent is not a reasonable person.  If they call her she will just get angrier.  She’s not going to suddenly become a reasonable person.  Hopefully my school can find a replacement for me another way.

In other news:  I booked my trip to China and now I have to get a visa.  The frog in the bathroom is back.

(c) All rights reserved Kimberly Fiore

 

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The garage
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The jungle is taking over my home
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Jungle home
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Driving Class
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Bored band
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“Planting” Trees with the School Director
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Planting Trees
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Teachers and Mothers “Planting” Trees

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Robin, the other Western Teacher
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Me and Tussany

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View from Busaba’s House
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Going Away Party
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Busaba’s House
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Karaoke

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New picture pose, holding tiny hearts

Football

Last weekend walking through the Sunday morning market was the first time I felt sad about leaving.  As is with change of any type, there is a wide mix of feelings.  There are thing I love about this little part of Thailand so I am excited to leave, overwhelmed by all that has to be done, confused about what’s next, and sad to say goodbyes.  I’m just trying to be with it all and still say yes.  I don’t know how I’m going to pull everything together to be ready to leave in less than two months.

Saturday after massage I stayed and watched football for a while.  There are always people playing football near the dam on Saturdays and Sundays.  It was fun to watch.  Someone is announcing the game over the loud speaker.  There are a bunch of people in the stands and on the hill are a bunch of wives or mothers cheering them on.  It’s fun to listen to the wives get all worked up screaming in high pitched voices.  Just watching it reminded me of Florida – the climate, the smell of grass, well, mostly the smell of grass.  I am once again reminded that one of the biggest reasons this has all been difficult is because of how much of it reminds me of my childhood.  My childhood was mostly unpleasant and I’m feeling a lot of that.  I’ve worked on the big issues from my childhood, but I think this is working on all the little things and tiny pieces of unpleasant that still hanging out in my body. None of them feel like complete issues or thoughts or events, but more like crumbs from those things I have already worked so hard on.

On Sunday the country voted on a new constitution.  There is much controversy over the constitution.  I don’t feel at liberty to write more than that about it.  Noi took me to the polls with her.  It was just a few tables, some guards and someone checking your name off a list in a school room.  I didn’t expect it to be anything exciting, but still, I feel a little more a part of history now.  The new constitution won the vote.

(c) All rights reserved Kimberly Fiore

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Tiny Dog at Massage Place
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Orange Dragon Fly
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Football

Ngoo

For those who might be following international politics, big things are happening in Thailand.  A vote on a new constitution is tomorrow.  There is much controversy over it and the results in either direction might cause big changes in Thai government.  I don’t want to go into it much as it can be illegal to express opinions on the subject.  But, I don’t feel I am in any danger as I don’t live in a big city where there might be protests and I’m not planning on travelling in the near future.  But, the near future should be interesting if international politics interests you.

The rest of this week I think I lost a lot of brain cells trying to figure out this grading system.  Everything Pat explained to me is different from what Q explained to me and Noi spent hours translating the forms into English for me.  Still, I have 11 indicators that I am supposed to teach to and grade the students on.  I just received these yesterday so now I have to figure out how to fit my previous lessons and exam to indicators I should have had before making lesson plans.  Logically, none of it matches so I’m just going to wing it.  But, by the end of Friday as Noi was trying to explain it to me again, I just couldn’t take it any more.  My head was spinning and nothing made sense.  I had a mini melt down.  This is so much work and it’s all bogus!  I guess a lot of jobs have stupid reporting processes.  I’ve heard teachers in the US complain about similar things.

Thursday after school, I saw a bunch of students with sticks and one of the teachers with a sling shot standing around a tree and bush.  Robin explained to me that a large snake (ngoo) had just dropped out of the tree and they were trying to get it out of the bush so the teacher could eat it.  Great, remind me that snakes can climb trees.  I knew that, but that fact was safely tucked in a back fold of my brain.  Now it’s been brought up to the surface and every time I see a tree I’m wondering if a snake is going to fall out of it on me.  There are billions of trees here.  The students poked at the bush with the sticks and finally the snake came out.  Two wacks with a stick and it was dead.  The teacher rushed in and grabbed it and threw it in his motorbike basket and drove off.  This all happened in about 3 seconds.

The closing date of my house got moved up a week.  I’m not sure why there is a huge rush on this, but that means moving my furniture out has to be moved up a week.  I awoke Friday morning to a bunch of hectic messages on the subject. I thought it was very unfair to put all of this on my friend Jay who is just helping me out, but it seems like it’s all a go.  Next week I will no longer be a homeowner.  Unfortunately, I will be a car owner.  The car is supposed to be in transit to Denver, but hasn’t arrived yet.

This might seem like a small victory, but I’m quite happy about it.  I did laundry and it dried that night.  Some of those clothes had been washed 4 times already because it’s been so humid that I hang the clothes to dry and 3 days later they are still not dry and they smell moldy.  So, I successfully washed and dried a load of laundry this week!

I think I posted about it before, but Q has been working turning this shack near our house into a mushroom farm.  It use to be four posts and a roof, but no walls.  Now it has black fabric walls.  Today I heard a lot of commotion.  Q and Noi were helping a guy unload plastic bags off a truck.  I went to investigate.  The mushroom house now has a gravel floor and shelves.  They are putting plastic bags of soil and mushroom seeds (?) on the shelves.  The guy was watering them with a hose, but a drip irrigation system has been installed in the ceiling.  One of the bags even has a mushroom coming out.  I’ve never seen mushrooms grown before.  It’s fun to watch it come together.

Here’s some random photos for you:

(c) All rights reserved Kimberly Fiore

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“grocery” store
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Restaurant
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From one of my students
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Waiting for a snake
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Snake in hand
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Sneaky speaker that blares monks talking at 3:00am
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Q in Mushroom House
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Mushroom House
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Already have some mushrooms
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Truckfull of Mushrooms
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From Mae’s Going Away Party
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From Previous Going Away Party

 

YMCA

The school had a seminar for the bad students a few weeks ago where they brought an expensive group of motivational people in to do a workshop.  I’m not sure of the details.  That’s the best I could understand from what was described to me.  Ever since then, teachers are running around saying “I can; You can; We can!”  I assume this was part of the motivational workshop.  The other thing that’s new that I think came out of this is that most mornings at assembly, the students have to turn to the student next to them, high five, shake hands and then hug.  This happens randomly between teachers or teachers and students too.

Tonight is another going away party for Mae.  This is for all the teachers and school staff.  It will be just like the one I went to last week where there is food, speeches, giving of gifts, tons of selfies and karaoke.  I went home first and ate pre dinner which was a great idea.  Then I could eat a little at the dinner, but not be hungry or eat just rice.  When I arrived, Pat’s husband was excited to see me and asked for a hug.  I think he’s trying to buy into the new motivational thing going on.  It was super cute though.  After all the speeches and gifts, it was karaoke time and I knew how it was going to go.  There would be some Thai songs and then a half hour in or so, there would be YMCA.  There was no use trying to fight it.  So, instead, I got my phone out and documented it so I could share this thing of wonder with you.  I’m sorry that the video is sideways.  I  have no idea how to flip a video.  Even sideways, it’s pure gold.

(c) All rights reserved Kimberly Fiore20160803_201400

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Me and Mae

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4 Hours of Karaoke

So, Mae is leaving.  She is the Burmese language teacher I use to share an office/classroom with.  She is one of my favorite people here.  Even though she doesn’t speak much English, her ability to understand my sign language and gesturing is quite amazing.  I will miss Mae.  One of the most wonderful things I’ve seen happened this morning.  Noi interrupted my class and told me someone wanted to talk to me.  Out in the hall Chelon was waiting for me.  She had a piece of paper with what she wanted to say to me written out in English so she could invite me herself instead of asking someone else to get the message to me.  She did a great job of pronouncing what was written.  She told me that there was a small dinner party that night for Mae and she wanted to invite me to come.

The dinner party was at Chatchai Hill, the sheep farm, resort place.  On the way there the other teacher that was with us in the car wanted to ask me a bunch of questions.  So Noi translated.  She wanted to know who my best friend at school was.  Of, course, it’s Noi.  Noi was laughing with this.  When she asked my why, I told her that she is fun, has a lot of energy, teaches me about Thai culture and asks me very difficult questions. Noi loved that.  This teacher wanted to know about Pat.  I told her Pat was a very nice person and did a good job of taking care of me, but she doesn’t do things with me socially outside of school.  Then the teacher said she was so sorry she didn’t speak English better because she missed the opportunity to get to know me.  Oh, I understand this.  If I could speak Thai, I would have had a different experience and would know more about the other teachers.  When we got to Chatchai, Noi said they reserved one of the karaoke rooms.  It looked like there were 8 to 10 separate little buildings which I assume were all karaoke rooms.  But, since this resort is kind of in the middle of nowhere surrounded by the middle of nowhere, I think we were the only ones there except a few people in the dining room.

My drink choices were whiskey which I don’t like much or some red wine cooler like thing.  The red thing was awful – whiskey it is!  It was constant eating and constant karaoke the whole night. There was so much food and it just kept arriving.  Of course, most of it would try to take the skin off my lips, but I managed to find a few things that I could eat.   It was a lot of fun, although 4 hours of karaoke is too much.  I was the only one who seemed to think this so I kept that to myself.  The school director (principal) was there.  Hipster 0 was there.  Did I write about Hipster 0 in the past or just think about it?  I think I’ve found the original hipster, the one all other hipsters originated from, only he has no idea because he’s the only one here.  He dresses like a hipster without even knowing what that means.  The rest of the people there were other teachers.  Of course they wanted to know what song I was going to sing.  I was slow on deciding so they decided for me.  I had to sing ‘Have you ever seen the rain’ and ‘YMCA’.  There was one Thai song that attempted to be a hard rock song, but it fell way short and looked like a bunch of cute sweet women shaking their fists.  There was the throw dance where you did some cool dance move and then made a motion like you were throwing a ball to someone.  Whoever you threw the ball to then had to come up with a cool dance move and then throw it to someone else.  It took several rounds for me to get it.  Then I threw it to the Director who did a smooth move of leaning to the side and pretending the ball went flying past him so he didn’t have to do a dance move.  But, I do have to say singing YMCA with a bunch of Thai women as back up singers doing the YMCA motions was one of the best things I have ever seen, ever.

(c) All rights reserved Kimberly Fiore

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Chelon and Nok

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Say Yes

I have heard the concept of living life where you only say yes.  Just say yes to everything – say yes to life.  I’ve tried this before, and of course, it isn’t literal – you don’t say yes to everything, but it’s the spirit of it.  So, let’s try it again.

Sunday I went to the market and got food for the week.  Monday after school I was going to wash the veggies and prep meals.  I was also going to try to research going to China since I have to leave Thailand when my job is over.  When my contract is over, my visa may be canceled.  Then I have 24 hours to leave the country.  After that, I can come back in on a 30 day tourist visa.  I have wanted to visit China so this seems like a good time.  Anyway, those were my intentions for Monday night.

Monday after school, Noi told me that the father of the lady that has the coffee shop died.  She is the one that remembered from the first time, what I liked to drink and she is so nice.  Noi asked if I wanted to go to the funeral.  No, I just want to go home.  I’m so exhausted.  But, isn’t this exactly why I came here, to experience another culture?  So, I decided from now until I leave, I’m just saying yes and trusting that all the other things that have to get done will get done somehow.  First we went to a tiny shop in the neighborhood.  Noi said it was a small shop, but it had everything.  She needed envelopes and I badly needed a coca cola.  This store was smaller than my bathroom, but it had food, snacks, a coca cola, a bunch of other things and envelopes.  It did seem to have everything – kind of like a magician’s bag.  We got two envelopes.  You put money in the envelope and put your name on the outside to give to the family of the deceased.

When someone dies they do a funeral type service every night for 3 nights.  This was the last night.  They put a large event tent over the road in front of the family’s house.  There was a very bright white light at the intersection with a rotating red light on top so people knew where to go or not to drive down that street.  It was bright and blingy enough I thought maybe there was going to be a dance party after, but no.  So basically everyone sits in plastic chairs in the street in the front of the house under a long tent.  The family and monks are in the house or in the yard – not sure as we were in the street.  There was a lot of chanting and then the monks and family walked out.  We got to give her our envelopes as she came by and greeted us.  She seemed so touched that I came and I thought she might cry as I handed her my envelope.  Then they passed out food for the people that came to the funeral.  I felt very calm and grounded during the funeral service even though it was extremely boring.  I’m very glad I said yes to this and got to experience this part of Thai life, especially for a lady I think is wonderful and kind.

On the way home, Noi asked who would take care of me when I got old.  In Thailand, it is the responsibility of the oldest child to take care of their parents once the child is an adult.  She has told me on several occasions that she thought our government takes care of us when we are old.  I think she’s starting to get it that our government doesn’t provide much for us – she thought the government took care of us when we were sick, out of work, old, etc.  So, if our government doesn’t help and I don’t have children, who will take care of me?  I said no one.  That wasn’t a good enough answer for her.  So, I told her I would move back to Thailand and live with her.  This was the correct answer.  She told me if I moved back to Thailand, I would not have to worry about anything.  I would be taken care of.  So, there, my retirement plan is secure.  Check.

(c) All rights reserved Kimberly Fiore

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This vine grew overnight and attached itself to my bike
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Sitting in the street at the funeral
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My view for 20 minutes a the funeral
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Funeral beacon – so bright I can’t even get a picture of it

Hello Kitty

I always enjoy the market.  Sunday morning has the biggest market in the village.  It has rained a lot the last couple of days so the market was a mud pit.  There was a whole section I just looked at and decided I couldn’t go in.  I didn’t think I could make it out without casualties.  Whatever was in there, I just didn’t need.  I did get a Hello Kitty pancake which made me very happy – the little things…..  I swept the house, defrosted the refrigerator (unplug it and open the door until all the ice melts), read a chapter and did some blogging.  It almost feels like a normal day, the kind of weekend I envisioned I would be having here, not the constant lesson planning I’ve been having.

In the afternoon, Tip picked me up for a Sam Ngao road trip.  She wanted to go to the Sam Ngao temple to drop off a donation for the monks.  I had never been to this temple, but had driven past it quite a few times when someone took me to Ban Tak or Tak.  It’s also the temple that comes up when you google Sam Ngao.  After that we went to another temple.  This one was on the Ping River and was in the jungle.  You had to drive through farms on a dirt road for quite a while to get there.  The buildings were much more simple without all the gaudy glittery colored ornament.  I thought it was very beautiful.  Lining the river was a long line of large Buddha statues.  Tip said there were over 100 of them.  I counted over 50 as we walked along, but they kept going off into the distance.  Tip explained that there were jungle temples and city temples.  The jungle temples were simpler with less buildings.  I think I like the jungle temples better.

Oh, and there were buffalo walking down the street.  This is far better than cows walking down the street.  Just so you know.

As we were driving out we passed Chatchai, which I had passed many times before and always wondered what it was.  It has a lot of signs and a big entrance with sheep statues.  Tip said it was a resort.  On the way back we drove through.  It’s a huge, quite, almost deserted resort with a sheep farm in the middle.  I wonder how this stays in business in a very rural village in the middle of nowhere.  It was very beautiful.  If you are looking for a very nice and quiet place to get away, this is the place.

Now I’m at home avoiding doing research on what is next to do.  Where am I going to go in October?  What am I going to do after that?  It’s a giant world out there and figuring this out seems like a daunting task.

(c) All rights reserved Kimberly Fiore

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This one has some extra bling

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Traditional Style Thai House
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Traditional Style Thai House

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Pretty nice monk housing

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Buffalo

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Doraemon

It was kind of a normal week except I was done with lesson planning on Saturday instead of Sunday!  Whoa!

One of my M6 classes (12 grade) always wants me to sing or dance.  They love music.  So I brought in music related to the doctor since my lesson was on health.  They went nuts and got up and started dancing.  Then after the first song they wanted to play Doraemon songs.  I knew Doraemon was a cartoon, but had no idea Doraemon also had electronic dance music too.  Huh….Who knew?  The other M6 class was a bit different.  They sat on the edge of their seats watching the video that went with the song and had little interest in dancing.  The first class was oblivious there was a video.  So far most, if not all Thai music I have heard is horrible.  It’s like bad walmart sappy love song lounge music.  Doraemon throwing down the beats was a welcome change.  When I told Noi about the M6 class loving to dance she said that was because that class had a lot of boy girls in it. I assumed this was like a very effeminate boy. It does seem that is true.

I’m still amazed by the restaurants here.  It’s a wonder I’ve only gotten sick twice.  Not one place I have eaten in since I got to Thailand would pass a health department inspection in the US.  Yet, it all seems to be just fine.  All of them in my area are outdoor kitchens.  The number of chickens I saw running around kitchens this week alone was mind boggling.  We went back to one of the places I wrote about before where there were so many chickens and flies.  I’m now naming this food shop, House of Chicken.  No food shops appear to have names and if they did, I couldn’t read the sign anyway, so House of Chicken it is.  They were everywhere, pecking at a bag of food, playing in the sink of dirty dishes, pecking at the frying pan, running in the street.  The kitchens are like camping kitchens.  I feel like I’m just camping 24/7, but with a lot more chickens.  Yet, no one seems to get sick, including myself so maybe we are just over paranoid in the US?

I went to Tak with Noi one day after school.  I went to the bank to find out why I can’t transfer money on line.  The lady helped me register for on-line banking, but I don’t know she understood my concern and I don’t think it changed anything.  I also went to the store to buy cheese and cereal – both things I can’t get in my village and can’t live without.  I ran into the western teacher I had met in Chiang Rai.  That was kind of funny.  We stopped at a teacher’s credit union / co-op type thing after the store.  There was a younger kid in there.  I assumed his mom was one of the ladies working there.  All the ladies encouraged him and cheered him on as he tried to speak English with me.  He asked my name and where I was from, my favorite food, and a few other questions.  Very cute.

Of course there were no classes Friday afternoon because it was National Thai Language Day so there were speeches, dances and other performances all afternoon.  No one told me until about lunch time.  Oh well, that’s just one less lesson plan I have to do for next week.  There was a going away party for one of the teachers after school.  I was told about this in the afternoon.  I felt funny going since I didn’t even know who was leaving until she got up after dinner for all the speeches and photos.  But, I didn’t want to offend anyone by not going and I was curious what a going away party would be like.  It had lots of Thai music, spicy food, rice, sugary sweet sodas, whiskey, speeches, giving of gifts, lots of photos, lots of selfies, and karaoke.  I managed to find some food that I could eat.  I probably should have tried the whiskey, but I don’t really like whiskey.  I tried the atomic fallout green soda.  It was quite delicious.  They love to take photos of gifting.  So there is a overly posed photo of every gift she received being handed over by the giver.  Still, as I sat there and looked around, I felt very strongly like I was a guest at someone’s family dinner.  This is a family and they truly care about each other.  I did get a not so good video of my next door neighbor, Q, singing karaoke.  A lot of people asked if I did karaoke, but I don’t know any of the songs and I can’t read the words on the screen.

I left my motorbike at school because it was raining so hard when I left.  So, I walked up to get it Saturday morning.  The janitor, Q, and some of the other male teachers were sitting in front of the school office around the drink cooler obviously working on the left over whiskey.  They wanted to know where I was going.  “Teacher Rraine, where you go?”  They also wanted to know where I was going in October.  Then the janitor proceeded to say he loved me about 7 or 8 times.  “Teacher Rraine, I love you.”  I’m going to guess he thinks that means he likes me or he will miss seeing me when I leave, not that he actually loves me, but who knows.  He barely speaks English so I’ll chalk it up to that, that and whiskey.

The coffee shop was closed so I texted the lady that makes salads and burgers to see if she was open because I know she has coffee and wifi.  She was open so I spent most of the day there.  The tables and chairs were very uncomfortable, but there’s more than sugar on the menu so I got an egg ham and cheese sandwich was was delicious.  A lot of students came in while I was there.  It was a nice change of pace.  I did massage yesterday too.  It was one of the most painful yet.  When he worked on my shoulders I cried.  I was glad this was near the end of the massage because it felt like there was so much crying and screaming wailing wanting to come up.  I just don’t feel safe letting that volume of emotion out in that atmosphere.  After he gave me his phone number.  I think he was trying to tell me he would work on me at my home or his or come get me if it was raining.  He was either trying to give me a safe place to work next time or he was hitting on me.  I really have no idea.  I went home after and tried to release some of emotions I’m holding in my shoulders, but nothing came up.  How can that be?  I know it’s there.  Even as I write this, I can feel so much crying stuck in there, but I can’t reach it.  Maybe tomorrow….

(c) All rights reserved Kimberly Fiore

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The best crispy pork is made here
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The Ping River from Crispy Pork Restaurant
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House of Chicken Restaurant
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House of Chicken Restaurant
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She is cooking my lunch right now at House of Chicken
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Chicken
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What?  There’s a chicken behind me?
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This is a restaurant

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Teacher’s Party
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Giving of the gifts
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New Coffee Shop
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New Coffee Shop

Short Week

I came back from Chiang Mai with Noi and Chelon.  We stopped in Lampang and I got to see some of Noi’s home there.  After I got home, the rest of the day was laundry and cleaning.  It was nice to have a short week – 2 days.

Somehow, Pat realized that I wasn’t the right person to be creating the curriculum for the Mini English Program and she assigned different parts to all the other English teachers.  I will proof read what she writes though.

My MEP students did horrible on their tests.  I didn’t think the test were that hard.  Pat suggested I re-test them.  In America, they would fail and if they failed enough, they would be held back a year.  But, here, they help them by re-testing or giving them other ways to make better marks.  I think I will re-test them, but then average the scores of the two tests.

I got home Friday and just decided to go to bed early.  I slept 12 hours.  I needed that.  I know a huge part of why I don’t like teaching is that being in a school setting is reminding me how much I hated my childhood.  It’s exhausting, but it’s also good to be facing it head on.  I know that much of what I feel isn’t real.  There is absolutely no reason to feel negatively about any of this – it’s old stories.  I’ve known this for a long time, but it feels like I’m looking at it from a different angle as if I’m not actually feeling this childhood stuff, but watching myself feeling it.  It is very detailed as if I am looking at it under a microscope.  This is what most, if not all, humans do to themselves.  We spend so much time feeling things that aren’t even real.  They may not have even been real in the past the first time we felt them.  But we keep pushing play over and over and over on an old recording of a bad feeling.

I notice that music helps break the cycle of old feelings.  So, I’ve been playing music more often when at home.

Here’s some pictures and video of the students cheering and some pictures of Jetson, the village next to mine.  Even though it seems run down, there’s so much beauty in this area.

(c) all rights reserved Kimberly Fiore

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Holiday

What do Thai people do on holiday?  I had seen pictures of the floating house boat type things and was hoping to get to do one.  This wasn’t quite that in that the house boats didn’t go anywhere, but still, it was enough for me to feel like I could check it off my list.  Noi picked me up in the morning at the hotel.  I got to meet her sister, daughter, son, some brothers and some neices and nephews.

We went to a temple first.  It was one of the most beautiful temples I’ve ever seen.  It was a compound of temples.  They were all wood with beautiful blue roofs.  The dragon statues in front of the temples were the most ornate and fantasy like of any I have seen. It was such a big and beautiful place to be in the middle of nowhere.  It was at least an hour or more outside of Chiang Mai.

Then we went to the lake.  After we parked, a songtheaw picked us up and drove us to the top of the dam.  There we loaded into two longtail boats.  The boats took us about a minute upstream to a floatilla of floating houses.  There were a bunch of tables, one of which was ours.  We had lunch and then the kids had swim time.  The kids and Rraine.  I was the only adult interested in swimming.  There was a floating trampoline.  We didn’t spend the whole day here like I thought we would.  That was good as I was over it after about an hour. Then Noi said there was a change of plan and we were going to go to another temple and get coffee because the adults didn’t swim and they were bored.

The first temple we went to had a ceremony going on so we got back in the cars and went to another temple.  At the next temple, we all met in a room with the monk.  They had brought offerings of florescent light bulbs, food and toiletries for the monks.  There was some chanting and bowing and a lot of laughing.

Then off for coffee.  The first place we went was in the middle of a farm and was closed.  The second place we went was near a farm (or maybe there’s nothing but farms up here).  The whole family got coffee, sat around for a little bit and then took off.  Noi took me back to my hotel and said she’d pick me up in the morning.

It was so wonderful to get to meet her family and it was so nice of them to let me tag along on their holiday family outting.  But for the most part, it was me just sitting around akwardly not understanding most of what was going on.  As much fun as it was, that is exhausting so I was happy to have the evening to myself.  I went to my favorite pizza place for dinner, read a little and now I’m done for the day!  Who knows what time she’s picking me up tomorrow.

(c) all rights reserved Kimberly Fiore

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Pizza restaurant dog

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